NFL sourpusses demand you watch the S____ B___ on smaller TVs

If you have plans to watch the S---- B--- on your new 58-inch flat-screen plasma television, better change 'em now. The meanies at the NFL have declared it illegal.

The NFL has nixed a church's plans to use a wall projector to show the Colts-Bears Super Bowl game, saying it would violate copyright laws.

NFL officials spotted a promotion of Fall Creek Baptist Church's "Super Bowl Bash" on the church Web site last week and overnighted a letter to the pastor demanding the party be canceled, the church said.

Initially, the league objected to the church's plan to charge a fee to attend and that the church used the license-protected words "Super Bowl" in its promotions.

Pastor John D. Newland said he told the NFL his church would not charge anyone and that it would drop the use of the forbidden words.

But the NFL objected to the church's plans to use a projector to show the game, saying the law limits it to one TV no bigger than 55 inches.

It's a shame, but I understand. That one church could really cut into the NFL's proceeds.